Sunday, November 5, 2017

living unapologetically a life that makes you happy

A common mistake many among us do (guilty of doing so myself far too many times) is to live an unhappy life or a life without purchasing own poured within dreams as a result of trying to delight everyone else within our circle, that is everyone beside ourselves.

Having had five colleagues leave our service this past four months, three on maternal leave and no replacements (due to lack of funds) work  at my workplace has been piling up causing stress and tension between the remaining colleagues. Last Tuesday a colleague snapped at me (yaaaaaaay and I remained calm we thank God for the work within) because I left earlier than usual that Monday (had things to do) and she felt the need to finish off a task of mine when nobody had asked her to do so in the first place. The task needed to be finished before nine the next morning so it left me and another member in my team who comes in to work early to finish it off. She clearly somehow felt obliged to do something she wasn't happy doing so I asked her why do it in the first place but got no answer. Living that kind of life can be so daunting and can cause one a burn out or get remarkably frustrated and unhappy. Well I personally no longer want to be a member of the "I will do what is expected of me regardless" club putting others first when there's only one person we should put above all else. I've decided unapologetically without having to justify my every move and having to call present at a workstation whenever it best suits others to live my own best life.

This particular topic got me questioning and evaluating several things lately. Going through life trying to meet the expectations of your parents, friends, boss, colleagues, partner or even other church members whilst putting your own dreams or values aside is it really worth it? Do we unwillingly choose to please others because of the impact it may have if we choose not to do so? Or is it simply out of fear of standing up for our own beliefs and rights or because we don't have the courage to live that "I don't give two monkeys what others think" unapologetic life that makes us happy no matter who disapproves of our lifestyle? 

I'm tired of carrying extra weights on my shoulders when I only have one life to live and I'm trying to live it by following Christ's footsteps knowing that I'm  work in progress when it comes to flaws and my own cross to carry without sabotaging my own peace and happiness. Would those we try so hard to please actually go the extra mile to do so for us in return? Is the emotional exhaustion, depersonalization and lack of a sense of personal accomplishment really worth it? I don't think so and so shouldn't you.

Letting people have control over things such as what you should or shouldn't do, over your beliefs, who you should or shouldn't hang with, over who you should or shouldn't marry are all examples of what can or might jeopardize your destiny, life mission, your walk with God and your happiness. People will always have an opinion based on their own understandings or things they have going on in their own mind.  Yes every individual is entitled to an opinion but what they expect of you is it really what God has called you out to do or do they truly have your best interest at heart?

You and I as individuals are on our own path, are on our own lane, have our own goals, have our own aspirations, have our own dreams and are on our own mission! Analyse and filter what you internalize and what advice you choose to follow and what you choose to execute. Don't let other mere humans like you and I be your life dictators but let God be the leader and live that unapologetic life that makes you happy.

So cheers to all women out there who have decided like myself to buckle it up and once in a while not give a toss about what others want but put God and then themselves first.


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